All the speculation and rumours churning about before the 2016-17 NHL trade deadline are now old news. The deadline has passed and the playoff hopefuls and their teams are set. But the player trades are not the only ones worth debating in hockey circles.
It’s a well known fact that hockey moms hold trade talks of their own despite the lack of any media attention whatsoever. With the minor hockey season drawing to an end, and with no hard trade deadline for me to worry about, here are some of the trades I’m looking to score in the off-season:
1. A new car!
Honestly, I’m not sure how hockey mom Subaru wagon made the squad this year. She should’ve probably retired last season but has hung around to stick it out for one more year (and quite frankly the only way I was getting a new car was if I won one on The Price is Right!).
2. A new winter coat!
It’s only a couple of years old but I made the Hockey Mom Misplay of the Year by buying a white winter coat. I know better now. My new mantra: Black is the new black. And I will wear it to both Home and Away games.
3. A new phone!
My phone is just not going to make the cut next season. Every single time I went to take a hockey photo this season, I was told “Cannot Take Photo – There is not enough available storage to take photo. You can manage your storage in Settings.” I’m so done with storage management. I’ve got my eye on some new players with plenty of gigs!
4. A paintbrush!
My new paintbrush will play on the same line as the paint roller and the can of paint. This winning line will take care of the new paint job for the laundry room. My vinyl LPs from the ’70’s had less scuff marks than the floor and walls in my house … no thanks to all those hockey bags!
5. A new flask … I mean travel mug of course!
Both – I mean the travel mug – are showing a few too many signs of wear and tear (or should I say drink and rink?). It’s time for a new one (of each!).
It’ll be a tough call as to which of these trades can be pulled off before the next season starts, but I am confident in my power of negotiation and my ability to beg and plead. Any and all possibilities will be evaluated.
Given my wish list, my husband is likely my main obstacle in all these trade talks. Depending on his willingness cooperate, he may be the next one on my list, though that seems entirely unlikely because who else would put up with a seasoned hockey mom than a seasoned hockey dad?!
Is there a secret trade you’ve been longing for this hockey season? I do hope you’ll share them in the comments!
Three cheers for your own hockey mom trade talks – and may all your dreams come true!
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