The NHL free agent frenzy began July 1 and some of the more notable trades have caused quite a tremble in the hockey world. Oh yes, the sports pages, television networks and radio shows were buzzing for days after the P.K. Subban trade for Shea Weber. Yet for some reason, the trades that I’ve been working on as a hockey mom did not even register on any scale, anywhere.
Hockey mom trades? What is she talking about?
Those agents and general managers aren’t the only ones looking to make deals. Oh yes, hockey moms are very busy in the off-season too!
Since the spring started, I have been scouring the internet and my favourite car dealers for the best price and performance in new winter tires. I’ve made several inquiries and am confident that when winter arrives, I’ll be ready for that big trade. While winter tires are definitely on my radar, sadly I’ve not been able to negotiate any deals on a hockey vehicle trade-in. The home team will have to stick to the same car for next season.
At my local second-hand sporting equipment shop, Mark and I are on a first-name basis. In fact, I have him as a favourite in my iPhone contacts and my husband isn’t even the least bit jealous. “What’ll you give me for a pair of Bauer size 10?” I ask him. “Aw c’mon, Astra. I took a pair of size 9’s off your hands last week.” I know he needs them though, as goalie skates are expensive. And I know I’ll need a larger pair of skates for someone on our home team. Sounds like I’ll have to hold out for now. Trade is pending, people.
There is no amount of scented laundry detergent or fabric softener that is going to get that hockey stench out of the old Under Armour. This is one part of the team where no trade can be made. We need new recruits and new recruits only. To heck with the superstitions, those long johns and performance t-shirts are going to mysteriously disappear from our roster… for good.
As a hockey mom, I am always looking for the healthiest, fastest, and cheapest way to feed my team (and it’s no secret that my priorities are not always in that order). So the off-season sees my recipe trade go into high gear too. “Wait. You have a slow-cooker recipe that your whole family likes? Everyone?! Well, hand that recipe over. I need it pronto! Have you tried my slow cooker chicken chili? No? OK then, let’s make a trade!” And on it goes.
Friendships can be bought and sold in the off-season too, you know. There’s time and energy spent during the off-season on making sure you butter up the hockey mom who carpools your kid to those early morning practices, or has you covered when you’ve forgotten to hit the LCBO before a hockey tournament. And once she’s on your team, there are trades a-plenty with our kids. “I’ll trade you a sleepover on Saturday for a sleepover Friday, deal?
Honestly, I know what these agents and general managers go through. It’s tough to keep all these trades on the down low sometimes. Now that all mine are out in the open, I hope you’ll share some of your off-season trades with me. Maybe we can make a trade too!
Three cheers for free agent trade season – may you always find the best deal for your home team.
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